sometimes things happen that we cannot explain, however one thing is always certain; everything happens for a reason.

This photo means more to me than I can possibly explain in my following attempt with my poorly constructed sentences of jumbled words. I took this on my way for the zillionth time to visit my sick grandfather. He was 82 years old. Alive and well leaving us with no worries, but yet still never taking him or anything he ever did for us for granted. Until, a rare deathly disease took over his entire body and took him away from everyone and this world. A true tragedy. That man did absolutely everything and anything for everyone he knew, from family, to neighbors, to people he would only know for a day. A handy many slash genius is what anyone would know him for. A kindhearted man with too much wisdom that another soul would never know what to do with. All that ever mattered to him was to see his children, and that very much includes his grandchildren, succeed. "If you really want something, you will get it." He always said that. He always said a lot of things. He was also known for that---"lectures" are what us kids called them. It kills me everyday, while I shower, lay down to sleep, drive somewhere, eat something, etc. I cry all the time, still, yes. What can I do about any of this horrid tragedy? Nothing, except make use of all that he has taught me so that it never goes to waste or fades away, none of it, ever. That is how we will keep him alive. I am still in denial a lot of the time and pretend that I just happened to have not seen him in a while but I will again one day. He was an engineer, a physics genius, a math genius, a genius in general, a father, a grandfather, a great neighbor, a friend, a cousin, a brother, a son, the glue of a very very very larg middle eastern family. He was, is, and always will be my grandfather.

There were many projects that i did with him and many projects that he pretty much did for me. There were so many more that I had in mind and looked forward to more than a lot of things I am passionate about. These are times that belonged to only the two of us, and for that I am grateful to hold in my heart forever. He, and a song that I heard one day, inspired me to start a new project with all of my grandparents and others who mean too much in the world for me to never hear their voices again one day. The project was to give them each, privately, a small hand held voice recorder and ask of them to simply record a private message to me that I would keep in my safety deposit box until after they were gone. And only then would I hear that private message, personally created for only me to hear. It was a message that could be advice that they've either told me or never told me before, just wisdom for me to always remember and pass on to my children. It was a message that could also tell a story and memories of me with them or something between the two of us. It was my grandfather that really made me want to start that project. The only thing from this that I can take with me as a lesson is that if you have an idea, move on it, don't sit around because it may be too late. That is a lesson that should be applied to all aspects in life. I've learned most of what I know from my grandfather, and I plan to carry on his ways forever. I love you Grandpa<3.

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spiral staircase, things we cannot expla, to heaven

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